So my sad face :(, turns into a frustrated face cause I think I finally got the pattern issue fixed. (hanging head) Nope, just a few things and it still needs a crap load of fixin. UGH! I get out the tape measure and start remeasuring me like practically starting from the upper chest and measuring practically every inch to my low waist line. Okay so not that much measuring, but I did measure regular waist, hight waist, low waist and inbetween my reg and low waist. I have a tummy issue, it's
Why the post title, throwing myself away, well because I did just that, I threw myself away. All the frustration of not having a duct tape form or even a commercial dress form used to drive me to get depressed about not being able to make all the things I wanted and not enough hands to help me. I surely can't get the hubby or my daughter to help and unfortunately I don't have any sewing friends close by to call on. When I did finally get my hubby to help me make a duct tape double I was happy that he agreed to help me finally and then instantly mortified at my size. I know I'm a big woman and I need to lose weight. I need to lose a lot of weight if I went by that BMI counter thing but I think it is flawed but it still makes you feel less than what you are when you get the results back. Weight can really make you feel like less of a person and that your options are minimal. I want to make lots of beautiful costumes but my weight is holding me back. I see ladies much bigger than myself who look absolutely beautiful and radiant and I wish that was me and then wonder why I can't be happy with me.
After doing all those measurements, I took that measurment tape to my duct tape double, it ranged from 2 inches to 4 inches to big in many spots and the arms and under the arm area, i'm not sure what happened there. I should have been able to unstuff, recut the back area and slip it back on and it fit somewhat, OH HELL NO, it didn't want to fit at all. It pulled my shoulders forward horribly, the stomach area was so out of shape and it didn't even want to close in the back because of the arms area. I started cutting in all the tight spots and that didn't even help so I threw my double away. GOODBYE AND GOOD RIDDENS! So now I'm back to no dress form what so ever. Now what, home accessories, pet stuff, accessories and skirts. I might be able to do pants and shorts, I don't think I really need a double for that.
Now I'm back to the drawing board so to speak. I'm debating if I want to do another duct tape double. If I do decide to try that again, one major change, not to let the hubby help me. If I do relent to let him help me, I will make darn sure he follows the instructions I hand to him or else i'm gonna shove that roll of duct tape where the sun doesn't shine. I love my hubby but he doesn't listen for crap most of the time. I don't have a lot of money so I can't go and buy the fancy shmancy form that I can add padding to to get to my size and the commercial forms, well I can't afford those either and most of them don't even go up to my measurements. :( I just need to lose weight so I can get a dress form that will fit to my measurements. I hate my weight but I think there are some other underlying issues that has been making it hard for me to lose and keep the weight off.